Last month I discussed selective mimicry, a human trait that’s also displayed by domestic dogs. That naturally segued into a discussion about how pets also might learn from us using this same method. This month we’re going to look at the flip side of this: how and what young children can learn from pets and how breakdowns in communication can occur.
Traditionally when people thought about children learning from dogs and cats, they thought about that knowledge children acquire by observing pet and free-roaming dogs and cats from birth to death. For example and ignoring any political incorrectness, Victorian parents believed that cats could teach their little girls cleanliness and the maternal arts, while dogs would teach their little boys courage and fidelity. As companion animals assumed a more intimate role in family life, they were viewed as a good way to teach youngsters the skills associated with animal husbandry that, the thinking went, would carry over into their interactions with other people. Even the youngest child can help wash and fill food and water dishes, exercise and groom the family pet, help Mom and Dad with training. Inherent in these lessons are two others that will serve children well in later life: patience and consistency. It is a rare dog or cat who will engage in certain activities before a child has mastered the necessary skills to communicate that doing so would be a good thing to do. Simultaneously, dog- and cat-savvy parents make it clear by their own example that there are basic pet-related activities that must be done daily, not just when the mood strikes or when there’s nothing else to do.
In addition to the way parents consciously use companion animals as teachers, even the youngest child engages is selective pet mimicry. As every pet-owning parent knows, pet food and water bowls are magnets for those barely old enough to crawl. Once there, these intrepid explorer-mimics will try to eat the food and drink the water à la the family pet by sticking their heads in the bowls, and will often protest vigorously when watchful parents prevent this. And while parents often express great concern about teaching the pet to leave the baby’s toys alone, babies must be taught to stay away from the pets’ toys, too, so strong is the desire to play with these. As the child gets older, playing “Dog” or “Cat” with parents or playmates becomes a favorite game, complete with meows, barks, growls, and other canine or feline behaviors, both good and bad, they’ve seen their pets display.
Then there are all those games children play with their pets. Although I acknowledge the positive significance of the disappearance of the once common dog house, crawling into that structure with the family pet (either canine or feline or both) for games of make-believe, intimate conversations, and even a nap added special pet-related memories to children of the doghouse era. Contemporary kids and pets may create similar environments and experiences by retreating into closets, under beds, or into makeshift blanket-tents. In all of these, the learning progresses bilaterally: child learns from pet and pet learns from child.
Going back to selective mimicry as practiced by both infants and dogs (and, I would suspect, in at least more socially inclined if not all cats), this exchange of information isn’t something that we can turn on and off in either kids or companion animals as it suits our needs. When we, with our cameras ready put child and pet together, what behaviors those two display toward each other also will be influenced by what they’ve learned from us. Parents who have not taught both their pets and their children to respect the other’s needs and limits can’t expect the child to teach this to the animal or vice versa. Those who yell at or hit their pets for what they consider justifiable reasons must be prepared for their children to do the same to the pet as well as to other people for what the youngsters consider equally just causes.
Similarly, sometimes the animal-child interactions we condone may have unintended consequences that create problems for both later. Before reading on, watch this video clip:
(In the following discussion, I assign gender to the participants rather than generate confusion referring to both humans and dog as “he/she.”) On first viewing, it appears like a funny game in which a young toddler opens a drawer and a young dog helps her close it by nudging it shut with his nose. At first every time the drawer shuts, the baby laughs, so it’s easy to conclude that dog and baby are having a wonderful time together. It also seems reasonable to conclude that the dog’s response has taught the baby that, if she opens a drawer, or at least this particular drawer, the dog will help her close it Meanwhile the dog has learned, “When the baby opens the drawer, I’ll help her close it.” A perfect Kodak moment, right?
To answer that question, let’s analyze this same video from an animal behavioral and bond perspective. The first thing that struck me is that this clip has been given two titles. The one that came to me through the dog trainers’ network was called “Childproof Drawer,” which implies that the dog has been trained to function in the role of child-protector. The one you’re linked to on Tagged is entitled “Baby vs Dog,” a title that implies this is a more competitive interaction. Because we’re only human, the title can serve to color what people see and think about what they see.
Having so prejudiced you, I want you now to forget all about the title and watch the video again, this time focusing solely on the dog’s behavior. The animal’s expressions and body language raise the specter that this might be more of a chore than a game to him. Almost every time he nudges the drawer shut, he looks expectantly toward the camera, which I suspect is being held by his owner/trainer and the child’s parent. It’s a look I see often in dogs who have been trained with treats to display out-of-context behaviors; the only reason for performing them is to get that reward. When the response he seeks from the person holding the camera isn’t forthcoming, his response to the child’s behavior becomes inconsistent and sometimes has an edge to it.
Now watch the video a third time, this time observing the baby. Notice how she, too, eventually looks at the camera and apparently gets nothing back that compels her to continue the game either. Instead, she pulls the drawer out further and sticks her hand in it, the dog bats it shut (fortunately not slamming it on the child’s hand), and the video ends.
This video and many such videos that can be found on-line or in family collections teaches us a valuable lesson about what kids and pets learn from each other: what adults think certain behaviors they’ve taught their kids and pets mean might not mean the same thing to the kids and/or pets participating in those interactions. It seems likely that the creator(s) of this scenario thought they taught the dog to shut the drawer and the child to open the drawer so the dog could do this by positively reinforcing both displays. However both the child’s and the dog’s response make it clear that they shared that vision only up to a point. When they reached that point, the predictability of their responses declined.
Getting back to dogs as baby-protectors, although some parents might rationalize this as a good thing, whether it is depends on the answer to one question: “What have the parents taught the animal to do if the child does something dangerous?” If the animal hasn’t been taught something specific—such remain with the child and vocalize to summon an adult, or go find an adult and lead that person to the child—the animal may respond the same way to the child as he or she would to any other insubordinate, i.e., grab the child with teeth and/or claws. It goes without saying that this would not be good for either the child or the pet.
It would be nice—wonderful, in fact!—if pets and kids only taught each other the very best behaviors each has to offer. Unfortunately, that’s not necessarily the case. But as adults we can stack the decks in their favor by teaching both kids and pets the very best behaviors before we turn them loose to teach each other.
If you have any comments regarding subject matter, favorite links, or anything you’d like to see discussed on or added to this site, please let me know at mm@mmilani.com.
Last month I discussed selective mimicry, a human trait that’s also displayed by domestic dogs. That naturally segued into a discussion about how pets also might learn from us using this same method. This month we’re going to look at the flip side of this: how and what young children can learn from pets and how breakdowns in communication can occur.
Traditionally when people thought about children learning from dogs and cats, they thought about that knowledge children acquire by observing pet and free-roaming dogs and cats from birth to death. For example and ignoring any political incorrectness, Victorian parents believed that cats could teach their little girls cleanliness and the maternal arts, while dogs would teach their little boys courage and fidelity. As companion animals assumed a more intimate role in family life, they were viewed as a good way to teach youngsters the skills associated with animal husbandry that, the thinking went, would carry over into their interactions with other people. Even the youngest child can help wash and fill food and water dishes, exercise and groom the family pet, help Mom and Dad with training. Inherent in these lessons are two others that will serve children well in later life: patience and consistency. It is a rare dog or cat who will engage in certain activities before a child has mastered the necessary skills to communicate that doing so would be a good thing to do. Simultaneously, dog- and cat-savvy parents make it clear by their own example that there are basic pet-related activities that must be done daily, not just when the mood strikes or when there’s nothing else to do.
In addition to the way parents consciously use companion animals as teachers, even the youngest child engages is selective pet mimicry. As every pet-owning parent knows, pet food and water bowls are magnets for those barely old enough to crawl. Once there, these intrepid explorer-mimics will try to eat the food and drink the water à la the family pet by sticking their heads in the bowls, and will often protest vigorously when watchful parents prevent this. And while parents often express great concern about teaching the pet to leave the baby’s toys alone, babies must be taught to stay away from the pets’ toys, too, so strong is the desire to play with these. As the child gets older, playing “Dog” or “Cat” with parents or playmates becomes a favorite game, complete with meows, barks, growls, and other canine or feline behaviors, both good and bad, they’ve seen their pets display.
Then there are all those games children play with their pets. Although I acknowledge the positive significance of the disappearance of the once common dog house, crawling into that structure with the family pet (either canine or feline or both) for games of make-believe, intimate conversations, and even a nap added special pet-related memories to children of the doghouse era. Contemporary kids and pets may create similar environments and experiences by retreating into closets, under beds, or into makeshift blanket-tents. In all of these, the learning progresses bilaterally: child learns from pet and pet learns from child.
Going back to selective mimicry as practiced by both infants and dogs (and, I would suspect, in at least more socially inclined if not all cats), this exchange of information isn’t something that we can turn on and off in either kids or companion animals as it suits our needs. When we, with our cameras ready put child and pet together, what behaviors those two display toward each other also will be influenced by what they’ve learned from us. Parents who have not taught both their pets and their children to respect the other’s needs and limits can’t expect the child to teach this to the animal or vice versa. Those who yell at or hit their pets for what they consider justifiable reasons must be prepared for their children to do the same to the pet as well as to other people for what the youngsters consider equally just causes.
Similarly, sometimes the animal-child interactions we condone may have unintended consequences that create problems for both later. Before reading on, watch this video clip:
(In the following discussion, I assign gender to the participants rather than generate confusion referring to both humans and dog as “he/she.”) On first viewing, it appears like a funny game in which a young toddler opens a drawer and a young dog helps her close it by nudging it shut with his nose. At first every time the drawer shuts, the baby laughs, so it’s easy to conclude that dog and baby are having a wonderful time together. It also seems reasonable to conclude that the dog’s response has taught the baby that, if she opens a drawer, or at least this particular drawer, the dog will help her close it Meanwhile the dog has learned, “When the baby opens the drawer, I’ll help her close it.” A perfect Kodak moment, right?
To answer that question, let’s analyze this same video from an animal behavioral and bond perspective. The first thing that struck me is that this clip has been given two titles. The one that came to me through the dog trainers’ network was called “Childproof Drawer,” which implies that the dog has been trained to function in the role of child-protector. The one you’re linked to on Tagged is entitled “Baby vs Dog,” a title that implies this is a more competitive interaction. Because we’re only human, the title can serve to color what people see and think about what they see.
Having so prejudiced you, I want you now to forget all about the title and watch the video again, this time focusing solely on the dog’s behavior. The animal’s expressions and body language raise the specter that this might be more of a chore than a game to him. Almost every time he nudges the drawer shut, he looks expectantly toward the camera, which I suspect is being held by his owner/trainer and the child’s parent. It’s a look I see often in dogs who have been trained with treats to display out-of-context behaviors; the only reason for performing them is to get that reward. When the response he seeks from the person holding the camera isn’t forthcoming, his response to the child’s behavior becomes inconsistent and sometimes has an edge to it.
Now watch the video a third time, this time observing the baby. Notice how she, too, eventually looks at the camera and apparently gets nothing back that compels her to continue the game either. Instead, she pulls the drawer out further and sticks her hand in it, the dog bats it shut (fortunately not slamming it on the child’s hand), and the video ends.
This video and many such videos that can be found on-line or in family collections teaches us a valuable lesson about what kids and pets learn from each other: what adults think certain behaviors they’ve taught their kids and pets mean might not mean the same thing to the kids and/or pets participating in those interactions. It seems likely that the creator(s) of this scenario thought they taught the dog to shut the drawer and the child to open the drawer so the dog could do this by positively reinforcing both displays. However both the child’s and the dog’s response make it clear that they shared that vision only up to a point. When they reached that point, the predictability of their responses declined.
Getting back to dogs as baby-protectors, although some parents might rationalize this as a good thing, whether it is depends on the answer to one question: “What have the parents taught the animal to do if the child does something dangerous?” If the animal hasn’t been taught something specific—such remain with the child and vocalize to summon an adult, or go find an adult and lead that person to the child—the animal may respond the same way to the child as he or she would to any other insubordinate, i.e., grab the child with teeth and/or claws. It goes without saying that this would not be good for either the child or the pet.
It would be nice—wonderful, in fact!—if pets and kids only taught each other the very best behaviors each has to offer. Unfortunately, that’s not necessarily the case. But as adults we can stack the decks in their favor by teaching both kids and pets the very best behaviors before we turn them loose to teach each other.
If you have any comments regarding subject matter, favorite links, or anything you’d like to see discussed on or added to this site, please let me know at mm@mmilani.com.